Unveiling. Part II

Approaching the total darkness that the human brain perceives as a challenge and even a threat to life, we are approaching ourselves, because our inner light finally awakens and begins to illuminate the dark spots of our being that need to be transformed and healed. As soon as a ray of light appears, consciousness expands, clarity awakens, and natural cleansing of all the secret corners of us as a human species, Homo Sapiens, takes place. As our inner light becomes brighter and brighter, we begin to shine naturally, to shine without an agenda or a specific purpose, and other people begin to feel it and it triggers mechanisms within them, and their inner light slowly, in small uncertain steps, begins to awaken and heal them as well. This effect begins to cover more and more people around and so the world becomes brighter, kinder, and full of love because now more and more people are radiating their natural inner light. But not all people are comfortable living in the light, some are used to the darkness, they know everything there, they know all the rules and requirements, and their biochemistry is adapted to existence in the darkness. Therefore, they need more time to get used to the light now and allow it to enter their lives. But some such people do not need light at all, not in this life, in the next maybe, but not in this one.

In 2019, I swam my first kilometer, my Ego was preparing me for Cyprus and my two kilometers in open water, not in a pool, and then the Bosphorus was on my plan. But my Soul saved me by literally and figuratively disconnecting me from the outside world and giving me neither the physical nor the psychological ability to do it. Of course, at that time I did not think at all that my Soul was saving me and I was going through a difficult challenge to change, evolve, and expand my consciousness, not mentality, it is very limited, but consciousness as it is infinite.

It was very difficult for me to swim that first kilometer, I honestly almost died, but my ambitions and ego motivation did not stop me, even though I was already starting to feel myself not good. There is absolutely nothing wrong with swimming, it all depends on the motive and what drives you. But ask any unconscious person why he/she swims, runs, dances, goes to training, reads books, etc., and the answer will be obvious - to develop, to evolve, to be healthy, etc. But being in a state of unconsciousness (I do not mean loss of consciousness, i.e. dizziness, I mean living at an automaton level, without awareness of cause-and-effect relationships and your responsibility for everything that happens or does not happen in your life), a person does not realize what motivates him/her and for what reason he/she is doing this or that in reality, he/she only thinks that he/she knows and understands, but this is only a beautiful sugar illusion.

So, after the first kilometer, my preparation for Cyprus began: choosing and paying for the program, booking a hotel and tickets, and of course training in the pool. One day, when I dived, I saw darkness.... I opened my eyes through those special swimming goggles, but in my eyes was darkness....I surfaced and took off the goggles, but in my eyes were still darkness.... My heart beat faster, and my hands and feet became soft and cottony.... I felt nauseous.... Anxiety level increased.... I closed my eyes and started to pray and breathe, when I opened my eyes, I saw some kind of picture, but it was blurry. I didn't say anything to the coach, I continued swimming, because that Yuliia, whom I was before, couldn't tell anyone that she was sick and something strange was happening, she was just ashamed. That Yuliia was used to being a leader and a star in everything and she could not allow something would go wrong, that she could not do something, and that yes, she could be unhealthy or feel good. I put on my swimming goggles and dived under the water again, I almost didn't open my eyes, I was afraid, terribly afraid, because when I opened my eyes I saw complete darkness and the rays of some blurred pictures. I have never been so scared in my life. But I did not know at that moment that this state and feeling of fear and permanent panic would enter my life for a very long and exhausting period of turbulence and transformation. The class ended and the coach asked if I was okay, as I was very pale and looked a little sick. Clenching my teeth and my hands, holding back tears and fear, I barely uttered: "I don't feel very well today." I went to the shower and stood under the cold pressure of the water. Yes, the water was cold, but I didn't feel it. I switched to hot, but there were no sensations at all. Fear and panic again came. I leaned my hand on the wall and felt myself being shaken, in my eyes were darkness and some blurred pictures again. I started to cry. The worst thoughts were echoing in my head, which were gnawing me from inside. I barely found the strength to get to the dressing room and change my clothes, and then I called a taxi because I couldn't go....

This is a small episode of which there have been millions over the years, I didn't think I would ever be able to get back in the water and swim, not underwater, but at least somehow. This summer I was able to. I swam for the first time since that time. I didn't swim my kilometer and I didn't even swim 200 meters, but I did it and that's the most important thing. Water has now become therapeutic and healing for me, wherever I go, I look for water everywhere to look at it, to be in its energies. And this time I just entered the water and swam as if I didn't have the old hard experience that was crushing me from the inside.

We do not want to accept difficult situations and challenges in our life, we want our life to be easy. But the truth is that an easy life does not change a person. A person came here to purify, change, and evolve through challenges and difficult situations. When everything is easy and idle, a person lives an unconscious life, a person acts as a consumer and will not be able to move to another level of existence, when he/she can be called a Human Being. Therefore, no matter how difficult it is at the individual level in the form of, for example, a serious illness, or at the level of the country in the form of, for example, war, it is all given for changes, and by the way, these changes were chosen by your Soul, and not by someone instead of you. Therefore, thank your Soul for your experience in the form of a difficult path and move on. Time will come and you will understand and realize many things, only because of disasters on different levels you become who you are now.

July 22, 2023.