Kite Surfing. Mallorca, 2023.

I stood on the coast in Mallorca and watched the kite surfers in fascination, I literally could not take my eyes off their rhythmic, graceful, and magical movements. Almost for the first time in my life, I felt that I was no longer afraid of water. It was not just a feeling of oneness with the water element that gives me strength, charges me with its energy, cleanses and renews me, it was something much more and much deeper.... Not a desire, but rather an inner stimulus that, like a flower, intensely unfolds inside me, filling with the whole palette of feelings and emotions, and forcing me to take a physical step, that is, what will already be manifested in this 3D world.

"That's what I should learn. I want to try kite surfing.", a quiet and shy voice sounded inside.

"You try kite surfing? Are you crazy? You can't even walk along the coast without a brick, the wind blows you away.", such a skeptical and critical, self-confident, and very familiar voice rang out, that voice that does not allow other shameful voice to appear and manifest.

"Yes! Because I want to!", said a quiet voice more confidently and persistently.

"What have you become!?!? You have lost your boundaries. And besides who is there lurking?" insisted a critical voice.

"That's me. The Soul. And who are you - I don't know!?!?! And I'm back now. I'm back home. So now you shut up and go away.", a quiet voice pronounced and sang like a nightingale.

"Oh God, what's going on!?!? What's going on in the world!?!? She's back!!! You see!!! She remembered who she was....", the critical voice wanted to continue, but the quiet one became increasingly more confident and interrupted

"I said shut your mouth and go away."

"Ill-mannered rude woman. You have lost your boundaries."

"No, I didn't lose my boundaries, I finally built them. And you go away - I'll decide when and what to do myself," said a quiet voice calmly.

That other, critical, voice began to twist, anger and rage, indignation and protest, took over, and the inner light and silence triggered its darkness even more. It no longer had a place in ones life, it was no longer paid attention to, it was no longer respected and, most importantly, it was not anymore a fear for one.... It stopped existing....

I continued to contemplate the graceful movements of the kite surfers, the active waves and clouds, and the beautiful performance that is called life.... They rose on their boards above the waves and soared in the air, their kites carrying them at breakneck speed into the distance.... Sitting there on the shore, far from them, I felt their freedom, their light, their passion that led them through life like a bird not burdened by life's problems and troubles.... When there is only them and their free flight....

I don't know what it's like to physically soar in the sky and fly under the water and waves on a board driven by a kite, but I was able to resonate with them and feel their sensory-emotional framework as if I was there with them.... I don't know if I try to get on the surf and conquer the wave in this real physical life, it is unpredictable and very interesting - no one knows how and what will happen, but I conquered my wave mentally and was able to feel the flight and freedom without adrenaline and addiction....

December 22, 2023.